”The man says, “Will that give me longer to live?”The doc replies, “No, but it’ll certainly seem longer.”“My missus dumped me ‘cos she...says I’m too obsessed with football,” said the first fella.“How long have you been with her?” asked the second fella.“Six seasons.”A young Scotsman leaves home and moves to New York. After six months his mom calls him and she asks how he finds the Americans. “Horrible,” he says. “They’re always yelling and screaming. I hate how they constantly pound on the walls. So, for this number, Evie and I picked up our guitars to join Inez's lead, and we launched into a blistering rendition of Shakira's "Objection (Tango)" Inez sang it with power and sensuality, actually throwing in a Shakira-esque hip shimmy in the middle, and even doing a more than passable job with the pseudo-rap segment near the end. The audience just ate it up. It was our nominal final song of the show, but right away, we began to hear the "Encore!" chants.We gave them two more tunes. We. It astounded the gods what great rocks that horse drew, and it executed half again of the task than the builder. The bargain was firmly established with witnesses and oaths, for the giant did not deem it safe to be among the asas without truce if Thor should come home, who was on a journey to the east fighting trolls just then. Toward the end of winter thefortress has progressed, and it was so high and strong that it could in nowise be overcome. When there were three days left before summer,. One Bad Day*** "Goddamnit," Tom mumbled what was fast becoming the litany of theday. "Damn bitch." Today had been approximately the worst day of hislife, at least as far back as he could remember. He fumbled for his room key, wondering for one brief sick moment ifhe'd managed to lose that, along with everything else that had happened.But no, he found it in his pocket after managing to stab himself under afingernail with the hypodermic tip of a mechanical pencil. "Goddammph!"he.
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