I could feel words rising in my throat, feelings I shoved down again. This was the moment, the moment everything might have changed.I leaned over. I l...aned away. She slipped away to the mattress and went to sleep. Nothing.Back in 1990, I'd wanted Alexis with everything I had. The missed moment still plays over and again in my head at night, sometimes in the doldrums of work during the day. Again and again, I wonder what would have happened had I leaned in.In September 2020, a package wrapped in. I was babysitting Scout. Our parents had gone out of town together again, and Forrest was at another friends house this time. So for the week, it was just me and Scout. I didnt mind. I was getting paid, and I had someone to play with. I live in the middle of nowhere, and non of my friends live near me, and I am 15, so I cant drive. Scout was nine, and was about a foot shorter than my 56. I guess she was good looking, not that I would notice. Aw, who am I kidding. I had a huge crush on her. I. I’m begging you…”Me: What a bloody hypocrite! You don’t see anything wrong in flirting with someone else’s wife, but when your bitch falls for a cock, then you find it wrong? I’ll tell him to fuck her in the ass…The pervert guy stood up and bowed his hands to me. He was no longer sobbing and looking desperate. That happened when I took out my phone to see how my husband (sleeping in the suite) was doing.Pervert guy: I am sorry for behaving like a pig, Madam. Please kick me if you want, punch. And so, the afternoon passed. I talked to Linda and Steve spent time with his new sextant. After a noon sight of the sun and an hour of cursing over his calculations, we all had a good laugh when Steve proudly announced that we were somewhere off the coast of Brazil.At about 3 P.M. we saw a thunderstorm approaching. The weather radio announced that the storm was moving East. Steve altered course West. The storm seemed to follow us."Linda, grab the wheel, Chuck and I are going to shorten.
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