"Joan, I wish you were willing to leave. I am worried."Joan looked at him and said, "Todd, I will leave right now if you will drive me and stay with m.... Otherwise, the matter is closed. When you can get away, I hope you will be here with me. You must promise to be careful. I want to see you again. I can cook other meals and want you around to try them all." Eve's head and my own popped up at that. Joan blushed. "I care about Todd. He's been kind to me. I really, really like him."It was late. On top of that, I had to build a new relationship with Neil as my new line manager, and play my role as a senior member of the company management team. My hours began to stretch.In some ways I didn't mind that. Less time to pick at my emotional wounds, and maybe, as my Mother would say 'it'll only get better if you don't pick it' But work was hard work, and totally exhausting, and I still missed Beth to go home to with her understanding, help and support on tough days.One bit of good news was. And when it smacks me in the face, I hurt for it. And I guess your text did just that. I wanted to tell you that at lunch, but when I saw you and how happy you were and those big brown eyes looking at me so carefree, I didn’t want to ruin it. I know what we have, truly I do. It’s purely sexual. And I really thought I was able to separate sex from feelings. I thought if I could have sex like a man purely to just have sex without guilt, feelings or emotions, it would be fun. But I’m finding the. What are you planning?”“What do you know about the stock market?”“It’s pie in the sky,” she shrugged, “We don’t have the money for it.”“Not necessarily,” James said. “Gamblers can beat blackjack if they know how to count cards and poker players beat other players by knowing their tells.”“That’s a very specific comment.” She narrowed her eyes at her husband, who coughed and looked innocent.“True, but it remains the same,” James shrugged. “The market has its own tells and with enough research.
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