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."Several minutes later, Howard turned away from the mirror, realizing that for the first time in several days... he was hungry. Really hungry. With t...at, he halfway ran to the kitchen to get something to eat. As he did so, he was surprised at just how wide awake and energetic he felt for the morning. And that was without even a single cup of coffee."Well, I guess there are benefits to being young again," Howard told himself, realizing that he felt much better than he could ever remember. He laughed jovially. :"Just this once, my dear! In honor of the Day."I savored my tea slowly. It was warming, and gave me time to gather mywits.Taking a deep breath, I nodded to mother and we led a parade to themusic room.The whole presentation was splendid, from start to finish. I askedmother if she knew the Wexford Carol, which I had enjoyed hearingearlier in the week, and she replied yes, well enough. So I sang:" The night before that happy tide The noble Virgin and her guide Were. And damn but sure enough I felt five deep indentations in the flesh of my ass. “God damn it Eve!” “It’s not my fault your ass is so squeezable.” She said, smiling up at me ever-so-innocently. “Stand up.” I ordered quietly. “What?” “I said stand up.” Slowly, she did. “Good girl. Now turn around.” “Why what are you gonna do?” “You’ll see when you turn around.” I said coolly. She smiled wickedly and slowly turned, maintaining eye contact for as long as. When it was gone, he said, “Quickly! Another beer! It’s gonna start any second!””That’s it!” She blows her top. “You bastard! You waltz in here, flop your fat ass down, don’t even say hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave! Don’t you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?”The husband sighed. “Oh shit. It’s started.”A husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the wife looks over at him and asks a bold question. WIFE: “What would you do.
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