On the otherhand, this," I said, waving my hand up and down, "gives me aweirdly heightened sense of reality." Meaning?" I don't know. I've become much...more aware of my surroundingssince I started." Why do you think that is?" I don't know. Fear? Like if I let down my guard, I'll be foundout and beaten to a pulp." I'd like you to try something this week. If and when you'redressed, try to just be in the moment. Don't think about. Justbe." Easier said that done, Julia." Just try." I'll try." Let's. You two are my best friends, my only friends. You know what I'm like: shy, always in the background, always the follower and never the leader. That was you, Terry: you've always been the one in the front, the one with all the ideas, our leader. That's okay, someone has to be and I know that's not me, never has been and never will be."Eve, you've always been there but never really with us. I don't know if we kept away the boredom or what, but I can see now we were just moons in your orbit as far. I was greeted with a kiss on the lips instead of the cheek. I didn’t get the message and drank the water and continued with my work. Soon after that I got married. Mom slow danced with me at my wedding and held me close. I could feel her mound against my groin and became semi-erect. I thought hmm…an accident? We spent considerable time with my in laws over the years, staying at their cottage and house and them staying at our house. She always wore nightgowns and was naked underneath. Many times. I was on Facebook, looking at friends posts, when I got an unexpected, but welcomed, message. It was from John, a long time friend.John had stood by me through a lot, and I knew he had always had a crush on me, but never acted on it. I read it in disbelief, he was wanting to know how I had been, and if I had found someone special again. I told him I hadn't yet found someone, that's when he blindsided me, "How do you feel about a long distance relationship? I would love to have a chance."Did I.
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